If spending the past two years living in an expensive city has taught me anything, it’s that asking for things you want for the holidays only makes sense if you’re willing to buy yourself all the practical things you need (which I’m not). And also, that rats can be the size of small children.
Because no one asked, even though my birthday falls in December and is therefore an official part of the holiday season, I’m supplying a list I hope my family sees of the awesome-est of the practical things I am unwilling to spend my money on because I’m saving up for fancy shoes, a puppy, and an iPad.
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Running down the subway steps while caffeinating is dangerous business. Here’s to one less insanely hot spill on dress pants. |
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Because I work downtown, in the skyscraper-y part of Boston, walking from the train station to my office means I must survive a wind tunnel both ways, rain or shine, wind or calm. This is the country equivalent of walking-miles-to-school-in-winter-shoeless-uphill-both-ways dramedy, a story that is a favorite of grandfathers nation-wide. I buy approximately one new umbrella a month, because it is always raining in Boston. If only someone would make a portable umbrella that can withstand gale force winds without also acting as a para sail. I’m looking for it to last between 6 months and forever. |
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I’ve recently gotten into soup, which is easy to make and pretty cheap if you shop at the farmers’ market. The more I cook the more I realize the major plight facing the kitchens of the world today: how do you set down and pick back up a hot pot lid without making a mess or burning your hand. Idlers, this is the key to safe seasoning. |
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If none of these things are available, I will also accept one of these keyboard options for the iPad I plan to buy myself. (Or, the less portable version.) |
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Kate Sloan is a writer and editor living in Boston, MA. She’s the smart girl at the party. You can read her blog at http://staycutegirl.wordpress.com/ and follow her on Twitter at @kate_sloan.