—

I keep finding myself thinking back on this show. It was late June and felt the same as Christmas in the sense that your thoughts of winter all revolve around Christmas, not January and February. When this show ended, it felt like the summer was over, even with July and August on the horizon

—

A girl, the first girl I ever kissed (I won’t tell you I was a 23-year-old loser before I achieved that fact — doh!) made me a tape. I remember listening to it in the parking lot of some store waiting to attend a work function. I was smoking a cigarette and eating a Wendy’s frosty (I’ve been fat and gross for as long as I can remember) and “Ask” came up on the tape. It was the first time I had ever realized how much unconscious narrative we used to place on mixtapes, especially if it was deliberate. I heard the chorus. I realized I’d made a huge mistake

—

The song “Animal,” a personal favorite from the time I watched the band perform the song at the 1993 Video Music Awards, remains a strong song for my enjoyment. It is short and has impact and doesn’t feel like a victim to the lyrical wordiness I now find in so many of the band’s songs.

—

After watching the video for “Party Rock” a million times I recently heard a new single from the album, “Sexy and I Know It,” and having had such a positive response to that early video I found the new one. Hilarious is one way to describe the clip, the other is to point out that the clip offers most flagrant banana hammock flaunting since Hammer’s 1994 epic “Pumps and a Bump.”

I bought the cassette at a shop called Booming Records, in the Campus Town Mall in East Lansing in 1989. I was a freshman in high school. The tape changed my life, not just for the rapping, but for the music. Years later I found out that the Mass Production song “Firecracker” formed the basic music for “Me So Horny,” and this made me smile and find the song in my collection. But the beauty of sampling during this era was the fact that you DIDN”T NEED TO GET CLEARANCE to run these samples. It isn’t like modern times, with royalties and such. This LP is along the lines of Paul’s Boutique by the Beastie Boys as you had sample dense recording that foreve changed you thinking of certain songs. Nasty As We Wanna Be was the first place I ever heard Kraftwerk. Yes, the 2 Live Crew sampled Kraftwerk’s 1978 track “The Man Machine.” Not only did they sample the song, they used the sample on a track entitled “Dick Almighty.”

—

Mike Vincent is a teacher, dreamer, grouch, and runner. He lives in northern Michigan and his favorite Beatle is George Harrison.

Barry Adamson: Sung in French with Ms. Anita Lane, formerly Nick Cave’s.

Donna Summer: Disco version!

Paul Mauriat: Elevator version or slow motion soft focus garden rolling version

Pet Shop Boys: Open the Pod Bay Doors Wacky Vocoder Version

Malcom McLaren: Shitty Svengali Version

Sven Vath: Completely Insane German Techno Version

The Ukelele Orchesta of Britain: Totally self explanatory version

Cat Power & Karen Elson: Two chicks version!

Brian Molko & Asia Argento: Off the charts shitty version

Psychic TV: Did Genesis P-Orridge sing both parts as the Pandrogene? version

Einstruzende Neubauten: Industrial insane anti-romantic German version

Which is your favorite? Which is the worst? I’ll list mine but only if you go first!

—

Mike Vincent is a teacher, dreamer, grouch, and runner. He lives in northern Michigan and his favorite Beatle is George Harrison.

With that my doctor and his med student got up and left the room. I sat there with my wacky slightly kimono-esque gown on, one that tied in the front while I waited. A nurse came in with a machine on a cart and began to affix these sticky little conductors to my chest. She informed me that if we didn’t get a good reading I may need to be shaved. I made no joke. I looked down as she put the first chest electrode on my right hand pectoral “muscle.” As she finished I noticed a gray chest hair and laughed as the remaining four chest nodes were stuck to me. I had four or five on my chest, one on each arm and one on each leg. I laid back, looked at the ceiling and waited. And while I waited I thought about music. These are the songs I thought about while waiting.

“Heart” by Rockpile. At its core a song about romance. The intro to the song stuck with me and frankly, remove the parts about the lady and you have a song about a condition!

“Queen of Hearts” by Dave Edmunds. Made famous round our shoes by JUICE NEWTON this is a song in the similar spiritual vein as the Rockpile song. Of course Dave Edmunds WAS in Rockpile. Super catchy and just really super great.

“Heart Attack and Vine” by Tom Waits. A great track from this bloozy period of Waits’ artistic life.

“Heartbeat” by Wire. Fantastic track and the version that always sticks with me is from a German (they’re everywhere!) TV show Rockpalast from the late 70s. Wonderfully shot, wonderfully recorded and just so subtle. Sublime to quote the song. The beat of the drums and the bass are cardiac and it strengthens the song in every way.

“Elektrokardiogram” by Kraftwerk. This track, a real gem in my eyes, can be found on the very strong Tour De France Soundtracks LP from 2003. Again the pulse and sounds are from our own motor, our own engine, our heart. Not only an organ to be broken by love it is an organ that we can break on our own.

#10. I’m so messed up, I want you here

There is an infamous 1991 performance of “I Wanna Be Your Dog” by Iggy Pop, post-Stooges, which took place in the Paris Olympia music hall in France. At the end of that performance, Pop gets his lad out. I’m not kidding. As Patrick Stewart would say, “You see everything.”

I obliviously bought a bootleg of this concert on VHS in ’92 or ’93, when I was fifteen or sixteen and already a big Iggy Pop / Stooges fan. So imagine me with my purple hair and motorcycle boots, blithely watching Iggy Pop writhe and spasm across the stage, all the while innocently thinking, “Wow, Iggy Pop is so kewl.” And then suddenly down go his jeans and out comes his entire John Thomas, and my gum falls out of my mouth like Short Round in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

I can’t in good conscience post that version here where other young people might see it, but I did locate this lovely short clip that aired on the Old Grey Whistle Test program on BBC2 in 1979, where Iggy is still all writhey, shirtless sinew, as per usual. Rawr.

#9. I’m his alibi

John Waters has made films that are absolutely filthy. But he’s also made a couple family-friendly-ish ones like Hairspray (1988) and Cry-Baby (1990). Cry-Baby starred Johnny Depp fresh off 21 Jump Street, and happens to boast my all-time favorite, cheesecake-sexy, PG-rated musical number.

#8. Time, in quaaludes and red wine

BOW-IE. The man himself. He’s like a Sara Lee pound cake: “Nobody doesn’t like David Bowie.” He has performed many swoon-worthy songs over the years, but few as sensual and unusual as the televised Midnight Special Floor Show performance of “Time,” filmed in 1973 and aired in 1980.

#7. Kiss us hard on the mouth

Regina Spektor can do no wrong in my book—she’s absolutely magical. This country song off her new Live In London Blu-ray is a departure form her usual fare, but oh so good and unique; just like her.

#6. Caught it off the back of a toilet seat

This is probably the most mainstream clip on this list, but boy do I love me some Russell Brand. The song is a rock-parody about venereal disease from the film Get Him to the Greek, but it’s actually really catchy (no pun intended). It is indeed Brand doing his own singing, and fake-rock-star Russell Brand makes me go all moo-eyed. Work-safe except for one little bit, but it’s short. Just pretend it isn’t there. “These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.” And by droids, I mean boobs.

#5. The world is watching as I get undressed

There was some kerfuffle recently over a Daisy Chainsaw song being used in a Gossip Girl trailer, and some people my age who held the 90s anthem “Love Your Money” close to their hearts got their indie cred in a twist. I say good for KatieJane Garside—the Daisy Chainsaw frontwoman—and the rest of the band. This means a royalty check for them, as well as potential new listeners. I have always felt they deserved a wider audience. And as an artist friend so astutely pointed out: “If you really like someone’s work, you won’t oppose them earning enough to afford health insurance.”

The members of Daisy Chainsaw regrouped in 2000 to form the cathartic, very sexy and very raw QueenAdreena. Some days, we all wish for a hole to scream into. Most of us can’t, so KatieJane does it for us.

#4. Now, fetch this

The Cramps have been called “greasy,” “sleazy,” and “throbbing.” They are legendary and should need no introduction, but just in case: they are the originators of psychobilly music. However, even that description barely scratches the surface of the innovation and influence they have brought to all punk, goth and rockabilly musicians who’ve followed them.

The Cramps’ lead singer Lux Interior was his own carnal, alien cocktail, with just enough bottle-breaking, androgynous swagger to make him that much more appealing as he growled and gyrated with the microphone inside his mouth. He had a 37-year relationship with wife and Cramps lead guitarist Poison Ivy until his untimely death two years ago. RIP, Lux. This live appearance on the British television show The Tube is from 1986.

#3. We’ll get naked and—

This one is the raunchiest video on the list (so have a stiff drink first; it’s worth it), by alternative dance band Morningwood. Lead singer Chantal Claret—who is married to Mindless Self Indulgence singer Jimmy Urine—was also apparently on Oprah when she was nine years old. Crazy. She is so rockin’ and so fine, it hurts.

#2. Get down, get down, little Henry Lee

Much of what I’ve listed here is bawdy, but it’s not like I don’t have a heart too—quite a big one, in fact; I just keep it well-concealed beneath my bawdy exterior. But this video just rends my heart in two. If a performance makes you want to go make out with the person you love and also weep at the same time, you know it’s got something special, ‘cause that’s hard to pull off simultaneously. It’s said that Nick Cave and PJ Harvey fell in love right before our eyes during this shoot. Dunno if that’s true, but damn it makes good copy, and after watching this—I’d believe it. Thanks to Idler music columnist Mike Vincent for reminding me about this one. Henry Lee – Nick Cave & PJ Harvey

#1. When you only sleep with girls who say they like your music

Oh dear, the Dresden Dolls. I can’t get enough of them or enough of singer Amanda Palmer’s now-solo work. She and Dresden Dolls drummer Brian Viglione are a jaw-dropping duo who had great musical chemistry, as evidenced in this stupendously sexy video. Palmer is now married to author Neil Gaiman, who apart from being an amazing writer, must also be quite an exceptional man to have snagged her.

It starts starkly, four people in various shades of black standing in front of deep green ground foliage. PJ Harvey is easily recognized, looking fetching clad all in black. Yet hers is not the first voice, no, the first voice belongs to Australian bon vivant Mick Harvey. Initially a member of the Bad Seeds now sprung free, Harvey’s is the first voice heard. Then Polly Harvey, then Jon Parish then the other guy (who I am assuming is the producer Flood). All four sing the song, coming in at different points. And after 1.54 of this the song closes slowly. And then begins anew. But this version, the second version on the video, is the full band version, recoded in studio with full instrumentation.

Over the weekend, in an apparent state of delirium, I dreamt of a street in Australia. The street was across the University of New South Wales campus and housed the bus station to catch the 373 to Circular Quay and Syndey Harbor. The name of the road is ANZAC Parade. I didn’t spend much time on this street but I dreamt of it over the weekend. Waking and coughing I thought about the Australia and New Zealand Army Corps, the organization that lends their name to the acronym. To the untrained or the basically informed, the ANZAC are probably best known for the eight month battle of the Gallipoli peninsula during World War I. As the first war felt by Australians and New Zealanders, the Battle of Gallipoli caused the death of 8709 Australians and 2721 Kiwis. Why did I dream about this? Why after all these years did my mind come back to the ANZAC? Who knows.

As I listened to the song out of the corner of my eye I heard the lyric, “Fighting in the ANZAC trench.” My brain stopped whatever it was I had been doing and just began to listen. When the a capella version ends and the band version begins there is a shocking depth to the song. It feels rich and sad and the images that make up the video are all completely striking and crisp and. . . mournful. It is a song about war, about friendship in times of struggle, about death and loss. The images in the video were filmed by a man named Seamus Murphy, who I can safely say is not a household name. Maybe he should be, though, as when I dug a bit deeper it turns out that Murphy is a war photographer who has been photographing the aftereffects of what nations do to other nations for many years. It seems that while the song deals with death, the death of a solider, the death of a friend (as the lyrics state), that the video is beautiful due to the song’s subject.

The images we see: older gentlemen, cows in the cold, an old bike, a football flag, tuning a guitar, birds in the sky. Every image you see is one of simple beauty. The first face you see is smiling, followed by the evening sun breaking onto a tree. Chickens. A pub. The little things, the little things in life that are the most important. The things in life that are lost in an instant when we die. Hail falling on the ground. The things that we might see all the time yet never pay much attention to due to the hectic natures of modern life.

The song is the last song on Harvey’s latest album, Let England Shake. Murphy has shot more than one video for the LP but when I think about the song and its placement on the LP and the video it feels all the more striking. I haven’t heard (or seen) much more from the LP but I plan to, all on the strength of this one track and one video. And as I read about the LP the choice of Murphy is fitting.

It also got me thinking about Polly Harvey as an artist. When she first became a force it was in the 90s, a wacky time as I think back. Her trio was upfront and muscular, as was her singing and presence. Spin magazine put her on the cover wearing only a bra and I remember the lines of record store customers who when faced with a female ideal that did not revolve around traditional beauty said “ick” more often that I would have liked to have heard. From there she mutated into a blues banshee on To Bring You My Love. A romance with Nick Cave led to a few haunting LPs for she released her “New York” LP, Stories From the City, Stories From The Sea. Thinking about nearly 20 years with this female artist in the continuum of music makes me think about the nature of female artists then and now. When I first became aware of Harvey it seemed like music was more open to different female artists—heavy on the word artist—existing in the marketplace. Now? Now not so much. There are no popular female artists nowadays that are different, that look different. This is not a slam on her looks, but Polly Harvey has a small face and a big nose. She stands out and yet is beautiful in doing so. Look at her in the video for “The Colour of the Earth.” She is clad in black, all black, yet you can’t take your eyes off her; glamorous minimalism. I wonder if those college kids, of both genders, that said ick at that magazine cover so long ago have moved out of that kind of thinking, where beauty is defined by desire rather than truth. The years that followed that magazine cover saw beauty become more of a standard, defined commodity where the content of the clothes became more than the substance of the person. Polly Jean Harvey is a singer of substance, an artist of substance, and a woman of substance. Long may she run.

I know a few people who are big Gaga fans and what surprises me is that they are totally dissimilar people. Something about that disparity made me a bit more interested in Gaga. I send to work in the sense that there are interesting sounds in the world regardless of cache, when I heard them talking about Gaga I couldn’t help but want to give her a try.

Maybe I don’t mind a few of her songs as I have been rather isolated from the ‘outrageous’ fashion statements and other things gaga has put out into the world.

What turned me onto this path is the song “Bad Romance.” See I heard it, saw the video a few times then found it on YouTube. I don’t want to say that I got hooked but I really thought it was a catchy, catchy track. There is a combination in the song; it feels like two parts of a greater song, what with the slightly Romanian sounding verses and the soaring choruses.

But the song for me is tied to the video in a way that renders the song lame when I’m not watching the video. I like the song but to hear the song while watching the video really cements the song as an earworm that you can’t shake. But I have not been able to do anything while listening to the song. Can’t run to it, can’t drive the car to it.

A friend of mine spoke to me about the way in which Gaga is using the beauty myth of society and setting it on its head. I don’t know if I agree with that. It seems of late that she moved away from the Klaus Nomi/Debbie Harry LP covers phase of her fashion and into a phase where she is showing (and shaking) her ass. “Bad Romance” feels like a performance piece more than a video. “Telephone” feels like a film more than a video. Maybe that is the core of who she is, a New York City musical performance artist. A tiny version of Jayne County or a jigglier version of Laurie Anderson with a growing dose of Madonna’s approach to sexuality. I don’t really mean to compare her to these artists, but when I try to think about her in a greater context I feel that she is a performance artist, one who uses the medium of the moment to further her career and keep herself in the public eye.

“Telephone” is another instance where Beyonce is completely upstaged by Gaga. Beyonce is easily overshadowed and while her attempts to step into Gaga’s world are brave they do expose her as a bit of a stale pony compared with something that feels new and daring. That said I think “Telephone” is a HELLUVA cut

Will her music stand the test of time? Will she fade away? Will the second full-length album capitalize on momentum or will it cease, like so much does, in the interim of when you are recording.