EarthBound: Make or break

All right. For the past few weeks, EarthBound has given me a great platform for writing about my unsettled personal life. My more astute readers, however, will observe that I haven’t spent much time actually playing the game. Based on this week’s posts, Daniel is finding food for thought and making good progress, and Andrew … Continue reading

EarthBound: I loathe this game

I’ve been slowly slogging throw this game and I am, quite frankly, close to throwing in the towel. I just got through the Saturn Valley area Daniel mentioned last week, but in order to do that I had to get through Master Blech‘s Factory which required a password for entry, namely not touching the controller … Continue reading

EarthBound: They call me Mr. Saturn

EarthBound is not lacking in the quirky characters department in the least. This is a good thing, as it is one of the game’s strong points. There are plenty of What the French Toast? moments in EarthBound. Case in point, Mr. Saturn. That is to say, all of the Mr. Saturns. Yes, there is more … Continue reading

EarthBound: I don’t feel well

I was going to give up on this whole “my life is a lot like EarthBound right now” thing, or at least dial it back a little. Really I was. And then last Monday, as I was having pizza with old Lansing friends who no longer live in Lansing at our favorite Lansing pizza place … Continue reading

EarthBound: Let’s roll another boulder up the hill, shall we?

I am two hours into a six hour evening train ride from Saint Louis to Kansas City. The long weekend has consisted largely of couch sleeping and liver-angering evenings. The sun has set, discouraging me to mindlessly gawp at small Midwestern towns, some dude, last stop, picked me to accidentally bump legs with for the … Continue reading

Earthbound: The things we carry

Part of me wants to start this column by saying that I’ve played a lot of RPGs, but that’s probably not objectively true. It would be far more accurate to say that I’ve played a lot of Final Fantasy and Dragon Quest games. So while the item management system in EarthBound feels revolutionary, I don’t … Continue reading

EarthBound: Zombies!

I love it when a game takes a funny approach to something I deal with on an everyday basis, like escaping the clutches of ghosts. Case in point, EarthBound has a scene where Ness and Paula hitch a ride with the Runaway Five to Threed. Now, the tunnel to Threed is filled with ghosts, which … Continue reading

EarthBound: A flying metal tube

EarthBound does not begin with a plane ride. This, to me, right now, is the one place where the game feels wrong. In 1995, a 10-year-old would have been able to get on an airplane alone. (I did, as a 10-year-old, and while I don’t remember specifically, chances are that I did as a 16-year-old … Continue reading

EarthBound: The grind

I have a deep suspicion that upon completing this game, I will have declared it almost good. The menus are clunky, the level grinding would be tiresome if there wasn’t a auto-fight feature (and, even then, it’s annoying) and whenever I kill a boss I feel relief not satisfaction. I will, however, hold off on … Continue reading

EarthBound: Happy Happy

This latest stretch of the game took a, surprise-surprise, weird turn. I had to travel a town over to Twoson, in search of a girl with psychic powers, Paula (her weapon of choice? A frying pan). One problem: Paula had been kidnapped. Who kidnapped Paula? A bunch of cultists, the Happy-Happyists. Hilarity, as would be … Continue reading